And Let Tell You Something Else, My Kraut Mick Friend..

*March 18th*
    Chuck Berry is dead. Just found out. Wouldn't say I'm bummed. He lived a good long time and made his mark. Thee creator of rock n roll guitar. You wanna start throwing other names at me, don't.
     Now that I got that heartfelt eulogy outta the way, onto the exciting world of Jeff's trucking adventure. For a second, I considered not putting the following out for public consumption. Then I remembered that it's not for public viewing, but for my own personal account. That made it easy. Anyway...yesterday was bad. I have really started to dislike El Hadj. Last night I was tore up. My nerves were shot. Not from driving,  but from my trainers endless over reacting. To say I don't jive with his teaching methods would be an understatement.  Fact is, I admitted to myself last night that I've been walking on egg shells for a week. Scared to death to get on his shit list. See...I learned that people in professional situations can and will make your life hell if they don't like you personally. My last job had a guy like that. So this whole week, I've basically been playing the bitch.  It's not like me to be that way. Last night I went to bed in my bunk with a several hour long brainstorming session running through my head trying to figure out a way to successfully bail on this plan and still get use out of my CDL. At some point, I drifted off to sleep.
    As the sound of another nearby truck revving it's engine wakes me up this morning...something hit me. This whole ordeal has been hell for 2 reasons. First off..it's not driving the truck. I like driving.  And I believe I'm good and going to be great at it. For one...it's the seperation from my wife and my life back in NC. But that pain isn't going anywhere. Nor do I want it to.  The other factor that's made this hell is the training situation for 5 or 6 weeks. Living with a stranger who's whole job is to criticize and scrutinize my every action. I've let it consume me. The thought of having one of these guys fail me on this has had me so rattled, that it's distracted from utilizing one of my greatest strengths....not being scared of the unknown. I haven't been deserving of my wife's praise. She has credited me and supported me by bringing up how strong I have been. I have not. But I am now. I basically had to bitch slap myself. Kinda like when Vito Corleone smacks Johnny Fontaine. "Acta likea man!"  El Hadj is a man. A human being. By most accounts, a decent guy. One who deserves the respect I've given him. But I'll be damned if I allow myself to accept less than the same respect.  And yeah...even if it gets me in hot water with the company I work for now. People smell fear. Even if they don't mean to feed off of it , they often still let it affect their actions. El Hadj has sensed fear in me. No more.
    As for today? Smooth as butter. Not one cross word. I don't know if he's sensed it in me, but he's watched his tone. I really wanna like him after this is all said and done. And I probably will. But I know for sure I'm gonna respect  myself when it's over.
      Does that previous sentence sound too "after school special" and make me sound full of myself?  Don't give a shit...it stays.

*March 19th*
     Connecticut delivery is on the books. Heading to upstate NY to pick up a load and go back toward Texas. I saw the route we're taking. There'll be no swing through Bojangles country. :(
       I've officially gone coast to coast now. And driven the majority of it myself . It's an odd feeling. A 10 hour drive would wear me out. Now 10 hours is just a day of work. My perspective of this country is reshaped to a degree. For the most part..it all looks the same. Of course there are exceptions, but I can't look at a stretch of highway in Olathe, KS and a stretch in Greensboro, NC and tell you the difference. California definitely has its own characteristics. The Northeast is easy to tell. And the desert is well, the desert.
   But I've seen some amazing things that most people might roll their eyes at or take for granted because of their subtle significance. Half a dozen baby elk grazing in a field 30 feet from the interstate. Thousands of acres of wind farms, all turning in unison in West Texas as the sun is going down. The grass covered mountains in wine country of California surrounding picturesque lakes that look like the labels on the $3 bottles of wine. But you know what flipped me out more than anything? A ring neck pheasant on the side of the interstate in Oklahoma.  I don't know why. I guess I never saw one...or thought they existed in the wild. Did I assume they were an exotic animal only viewed in captivity? Probably so. I've never claimed genius status. But of all the things I have seen that have left an impression on me, the one thing that I want to see the most is in Concord, NC.
      It's been 22 days since I've seen my wife. This better be worth it.

*March 20th*
     Columbus, Ohio. Some random parking lot. El Hadj is from Columbus and says he prefers parking here. Lots of room and the owners are cool with truckers docking here for a night. I don't know. Kinda sketchy.  The gas station beside us has had 4 different cop cars pull in and circle around. Now that I think about it, they may be responding to reports of some even more sketchy hoodlum walking around talking on his cell phone wearing work boots, black shorts, and tshirt from Los Alamos NM.
    Today I ran 10 hours. From upstate NY to Columbus. Pretty impressive I say. Actually El Hadj once offered up one of his rare compliments saying that most people don't have the stamina to start off driving 10 solid hours a day. I'll take it. Fact is, I enjoy road trips. That was one of the selling points I used to convince myself that trucking was a good idea. But yeah....NY to OH. It's wet here. When we left out this morning,  it was in the teens and 15 foot high mounds of snow all throughout the Wal Mart parking lot that we crashed in.
     Hey...I just did you, the reader, a big service. I just erased way too much mundane dribble about my food options that I spent 15 minutes writing.  You're welcome. In a nutshell, I've lost 25 pounds in 3 weeks. There ain't jack shit worth clogging my arteries with out here. Not at these truck stops anyway.